In the last few days I’ve been noticing an internal resonance with the story of The Wizard of Oz, and particularly with Dorothy’s character.
I realize that in the actual story, the Wizard isn’t really a wizard and is in fact a sham. I get that Dorothy had the power to grant her own wishes all along. None of that matters.
What I resonate with is the HOPE.
Because when Dorothy first set foot on the Yellow Brick Road, she had nothing to go on but hope. And in about ten days I’m going to be embarking on my own Yellow Brick Road, taking a journey to a clinic in a foreign land where there are no guarantees. While my main purpose is to accompany my daughter so that she can have her wishes come true, I have a small hope in my heart that the Wizard may have something up his sleeve for me, too.
My daughter has been dealing with a Lyme Disease diagnosis since 2010, when she was a sophomore in college. Mine came two years later in 2012, after twenty years of not knowing what was causing my supposed rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, and multiple other health problems. My son and other daughter were diagnosed later on. So we have four out of the five of us in our family with Lyme. This makes life difficult for everyone, and it’s not made any easier by the fact that what works for one of us doesn’t seem to be the answer for another.
It would be easy to see this situation as a curse, but I’ve recently gotten in touch with the blessing, too.
Really? A blessing?
Well, the truth is that I’ve gotten my own symptoms under enough control to live what I consider to be a very full life. I’m able to work, to give back, to travel, to enjoy my friends and family, and to go on fulfilling vacations. When it comes to the work that I put my heart into, I am living my passion and I know I make a difference. My main symptom at this point is pain, and I’ve learned to deal with that. So I would not go out of my way to seek additional treatment, since I’m already managing quite well. But because I have three kids with Lyme who have their whole lives ahead of them, and because I like to go support my kids when they get treatment (if they want me there), I’ve had the opportunity to accompany them and – while I’m there – try things for myself that I would never have tried otherwise.
So in the summer of 2014, I went on a five week journey with my youngest daughter to Nevada (for ozone therapy) and to Idaho (for biomagnetic therapy), and I got treated too. This winter I’ll be traveling to Tbilisi, Republic of Georgia, to help my older daughter as she gets phage therapy for her antibiotic-resistant acne. She was told that they will test her for everything else she might have going on, and treat whatever they find, so she’s hoping to get treatment for other symptoms and conditions as well.
I realize it’s a long shot, but while I’m there with her, I’m hoping they can figure out what bacteria could be keeping me in chronic pain, and that they have whatever it takes to get me well.
This clinic claims not to treat Lyme disease, but I’ve learned that this may be more of a cover-your-ass kind on disclaimer than the real truth. Certainly the woman I spoke to who went there for MRSA ten years ago (and who also had Lyme) returned in perfect heath and hasn’t had a relapse of her Lyme in all these years. And they do claim to treat some of the common Lyme coinfections, some of which I know I have. These can be worse than the Lyme itself, so although it’s a crap shoot, I have hope there will be something here for me too.
I’m keeping my expectations as low as possible for myself, knowing that this trip is a very iffy proposition. The only thing I’m daring to expect is some quality time with my daughter, and a good outcome for her health issues.
But maybe, just maybe, I’ll be further rewarded for taking this trip, other than my satisfaction as a mom. Like Dorothy, I’m daring to hope that when it’s my turn to stand before the Wizard, there will indeed be magic.